dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
