Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
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