Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Randomize
