apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
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