bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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