My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
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