I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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