I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
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