You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
She told me I should be a condom model.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
