I never want to see another naked old woman again.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
