MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize