lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize
