You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Randomize
