Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
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