can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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