he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Randomize
