2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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