wrigley field is MILF paradise
He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
Randomize
