Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
I'm having to shit out rocks
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