No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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