Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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