these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
I'm bleeding and have questions
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Randomize
