Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
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