I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Randomize
