now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
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