you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize