Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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