So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
