Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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