No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
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