I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
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