He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
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