Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
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