when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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