lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
...so i touched it.
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize
