It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
