i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Randomize
