Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Randomize
