remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
We left the knife in your bed.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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