Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I just barfed on his mom.
You told him you were too drunk to meet his parents. Totally his fault.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
Randomize
