I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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