Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
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