I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
