hotel room ftw
I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
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