in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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