so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
