My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
