Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Randomize
