He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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