I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize
